911 Help

How do you know when it’s time to let go and how do you know what to let go of?

 

I’m a perennial spring cleaner.  I like the feeling of having enough space to breathe around me when I de-clutter.

 

Some things I am sure of letting go.  But others sit through several rounds of spring-cleaning before I set an ultimatum for myself.

 

Today, I pulled out a few things from the banquette in my bedroom.  I felt it was time to let go of them.  Except for one item.  It’s not bulky, but it’s long and big.  

 

Rolled up, I initially felt that it was time to let it go.  But then I unrolled it and saw the dedication given to me by my former employer.  

 

Feelings of sentiment came rolling back in.  So it’s back on the pending corner.  Do I let it go or not?

 

I have no use for the huge tarpaulin poster of myself and my work family except to keep in inside my chest, rolled up.  

 

I guess to remind me that I once had a great work family that I belonged to.   That’s it really.  

 

I no longer have contact with my former boss and my former colleagues, except for one.  

 

I still remember my staff yearly and wish them well on their birthdays and every Christmas.  Other than that, life has gone on since I left six years ago.

 

Going back to the issue of letting go, if I discard the rolled up tarpaulin maybe in time I’ll forget about it.

 

However, I don’t think I’ll ever forget the memories I had in corporate life.  That will stay with me forever, I am sure of this.

 

Why do I feel some heaviness with discarding the souvenir?  Is it time?  I believe the time was long ago and it’s long overdue.   But I’m stuck!

 

I need help in deciding.  I struggle with tossing it into the garbage.  Am I hanging on to a part of my past that I should let go of?  

 

Surely, I can’t be a hoarder simply for hanging on to one thing?  One half of me says, it’s okay, let it go.  But the other half is silently suggesting not to.  

 

This is turning into an emergency situation for me.  Can someone please help me?

 

Wisdom, life, experience, reflection are you there?  I need a light bulb moment.  I don’t think calling 911 will solve the issue.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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