Sometimes

You just have to let it go and let things be.

Believe that in the end it will all work out as meant to be.

 

Everyone knows what his or her best is.

Not everyone cares to shout it out.

 

Others trust in their own silence.

I should trust in their silence too.

 

If I can trust that I know best, no reason not to trust others’ best.

Sometimes, there is no best, just let it be then.

 

My father’s colleague passed away in his sleep.

The day before he was up and about doing his thing.

 

My father saw him in the hallway and they waved at each other.

The following morning he never woke up.

 

To worry what will happen sometimes gets you nowhere.

It’s easy to plan things but how they turn out is all up in the air.

 

So I’ve heard many times over, “live now, live your best life now.”

What good is worrying about the future if one can’t live well now?

 

Sometimes, even to live well now is difficult.

We all have varying circumstances, thou shall not judge, right?

 

It’s Monday morning and my thoughts are cropping up one by one.

I’m rambling but it helps me to lay my thoughts out as they arise.

 

Sometimes, I over think, over exaggerate, over estimate and I over do.

Time ticks and life just continues to flow.

 

I just need to trust and keep on going toward where my best is.

Not sometimes, but all the time.

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A weather change

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Writing by candle light seems right given the rain that falls on leaves outside my window. It’s a trickling patter that dulls to a thump when it hits the ground. It’s in this dawn before the dawn that life is clearest, as if the rain is washing away a layer to reveal the next delight in fresh rawness.

It’s so transfixing when stopping to listen. Quiet time out. I want to turn up the volume for more!

A rattle of an open window and flicker of flame accentuates a breeze that’s barely audible. But it’s there. Blowing hellos onto my neck that’s undressed, cleared from the old in preparation for what must be part of this next wave blowing in.

A sip of tea, a gulp in decibels not normally measured.

A puff of air swirls in and down to my bare feet hooked under my desk. My toes tingle in a gentle wake up call. I hope the spiders lurking in the dark don’t wake to join in the toe tingling!

Change is stopping by once again. A clearing of the staid like this can only mean change.

The breeze becomes constant and travels around to waft under my nose and cool my lips moistened by tea. Each breath in is sheerer than the last, cleaner, and travels deeper within. The dross is being filtered to expose a new layer.

A gentle faraway rumble …

Here comes that ride of extremes, of loss and happiness and humblings of caring kindness, of passions that can question all that life is. It’s almost as a storm chase of dreams on the curve of any rain drop daring to carry.

Come, change. Every molecular zephyr is welcomed!

Another swirl of breeze, a sip of cooling tea. Chirping song wafts in through my window. All is awakening.

Change equals love, of the self and others. Accepting that change and appreciating it for its place in life as an unknown journey to somewhere new is the key.

A rustle of leaves outside. Change is not easy for many. Taking leaps of faith into unknowns can be more terrifying than anything imagined, crippling. That rumble grows to a thunder … heavier rain sweeps in.

Trusting in that change is part of the change and realising it’s not just about arriving at any end. Change is individual and always laced in a newness nourished by the freshness of more rain.

Change can make any heart sing, even when it can’t be heard. The heart knows what it truly needs. The trick is in letting the heart be to do what it needs to do. And maybe dance with it and the rain, and the rumbles of thunder now cracking.

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