Spit

After all the products I've tried to clean my computer throughout my computer use, which goes back to 1984, I've concluded that human spit is the best cleanser for the keys, mouse and monitor.  To borrow from Brill Creme, just a little dab will do ya.  If you don't understand the Brill Creme reference, Google it.

Mom taught me the miracles of using spit to clean.  When I joined the military, they also highly recommended using your spit to polish your brass and boots.  Spit and tissue, toilet paper if necessary, did a great job of bringing out the brilliance.  Shining your boots in basic was greater than the task but a matter of sitting down together with strangers in your unit and bonding as you buffed, asking one another questions and listening while goading each other into petty competition about having the shiniest shoes. 

There was none of that with Mom.  She was brutal about it.  "What's that on your face?" she'd demand of one of us.  "Come here."  Faster than a striking cobra, she had us in her grip.  Licking a thumb, she would mutter about 'you kids' while she vigorously rubbed the spit loaded thumb against the dirt speck until satisfied you were clean.  Meanwhile, my sisters and I were horrified that Mom was using spit to clean us, but she was doing it in public.  Mom didn't care where she was, and that included grocery and department stores, other people's houses, walking on the streets or in restaurants.  Dirt wasn't abided and spit was the cleanser. 

Her spit cleaning was more than learning about using spit to clean.  From using spit and a thumb because nothing else is available, I learned to improvise.  If I didn’t have what I need, use what I have, think outside of the standard space, explore what else can be done, and use imagination.   

So there I was, staring at my dirty keyboard, fifty plus years removed from Mom spitting on a thumb to clean my skin, licking a finger, rubbing down my computer because, well, I was writing and didn’t want to break away to go get something to clean it with.  That was really usually the case.  I just didn't want to leave the keyboard.  Besides, I had some spit available. Why waste it?

 

The keyboard looks a lot better now.

Comments 4

 
Rosy Cole on Monday, 25 August 2014 17:19

Well, I suppose it's cheaper than champagne which Georgian gentlemen used to make their Hessian boots glow refulgently :)

Well, I suppose it's cheaper than champagne which Georgian gentlemen used to make their Hessian boots glow refulgently :)
Michael W Seidel on Tuesday, 26 August 2014 06:04

It certainly is cheaper than champagne, Rosy. Refulgently - great word! Didn't know it. Thanks for expanding my vocabulary and for reading and commenting. Cheers, M

It certainly is cheaper than champagne, Rosy. Refulgently - great word! Didn't know it. Thanks for expanding my vocabulary and for reading and commenting. Cheers, M
Rosy Cole on Tuesday, 26 August 2014 10:57

Not my word, M. It was in common use in the 18th century to convey the importance of a fastidious turnout. Beau Brummel, the arbiter of gentlemen's fashion, manners and good taste in all aspects of life, devoted the whole of his energies to this sort of elitism. And was celebrated for it!

Not my word, M. It was in common use in the 18th century to convey the importance of a fastidious turnout. Beau Brummel, the arbiter of gentlemen's fashion, manners and good taste in all aspects of life, devoted the whole of his energies to this sort of elitism. And was celebrated for it!
Katherine Gregor on Tuesday, 26 August 2014 06:51

Yes, but doesn't it make your keyboard sticky?

Yes, but doesn't it make your keyboard sticky?
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